A Friend That the Universe Blessed Me With

Nomutima uyadi ehafo onda tokola ndi kufe embo nopena, ndi nyole olweendo lange nghene ndashakenekele kaume kange, oo ngaashi ngaha nekulu lange, nonda li nde mu pula ngeenge ohatu dulu tuu okutula uukaume wetu pondondo ya landula. Ohandi ti; pomafimbo oo kape na umwe wopokati ketu a li e shi osho shili komesho, osheshi ngeenge to pula mo mokakadona we ka hala, opena ashike eemhito mbali komumati; u hai tavelwe ilo wii tavelwe. Kombinga yoo yokakadona kange ka kwali keshi ngeenge onandi ke keetela omadilaadilo oo konima eke tu shingila mohombo yombili tu li nena.

Ohandi hambelele Tate Kalunga molwoshinano shondjila ile wa dja, eshi nena wa wanifa eedula omilongo nhee odo ita ndi hale okudi dimina, Molwashii oto monika wanyashupala. Muholike wange oto kulu wafa omaviinyu awa, nondili ndeshi hafela neenghono. Muholike wange, ina yovana vange vatatu ovo hava piyaaneke nge meendjla adishe diwa taa dulu, nena efiku loye. 

Paife oweshi koneka nawa nawa kutya keshe shimwe sha fimana andi djuulukwa okupopya ihandi kala inaandi shi tula pombaapila. Onda hala u shiive kutya omolwonhumba nongadi andi shi ningile; Onde shi ninga nelalakano eli; opo u ka mone natango omhito yokuuya u leshulule mo miitya yange ngeenge wa ka kala wafa to limbililwa nge.

Nena itandi ka tumbula dihapu nonande u shishilile kutya ohandi dulu okushi ninga, hasho nghelo? Dimbuluka eshi osha kala nale shomeenhengwanekwafaneko dange omanga inandi ku fikama ndiku patululile omutima wange.

Kwaame osha fa onghela okudimbuluka oshikando shotete twa shakenene. Onhele okwali omOvenduka,momutumba wiilonga, atushe aakalekipo voveta fimbo olo, hasho? Ohandi dimbuluka nawa; opefimbo wa li to fikifile engungo osheetwa po shoye. Owa li to monika nawa, exwiki dilaula dile dili momutalelo muwa nuumesho va toka nawa tava minikile keshe pamwe vali tava taalele. Mehafo nomuudjuu fiyo ongaha kwaame inaa lunduluka. 

Onda li andi hepekwa komadilaadilo; "Okaana okawa ngeipi hano!" Kakwali ndeshi nongela kutya linya okwali etameko lehokololo olo tali ka lundulula onghalamwenyo yange. (Ohandi dimbuluka nawa, handi lombwele kaume kange Malunge na Shikeva kombinga yoye; nde atu shiyolopo).

Pefimbo lokafudepo twii xwike noka-ofiwa pominino ondeshi dana momukalo ou ndiku pandule molwoshipopiwa sha longekidwa nawa, ashike okupopya uukwashili, pefimbo opo ondahangikile nda ya nale kokule nama dilaadilo. Okudja opo otwa kala nokupopya po kashona,nokonima otwe lipa uunomola veengodi. Okudja kefiku olo otwa panga uukaume.

Lwanima owa ka dimbulula kutya vahapu vomookaume kange ookaume koye yoo, ovo va kala luhapu nokwiifana nge "Uncle OK" (Ngaashi Karen noovakwao vamwe, onda hala kutya, vahapu vomuvo ova kala nokwiifana nge uncle molwomatomhelo oo andi dulu okupopila, (eshi ohandi shi anene), Manga inandi shi shiiva naave owa kala nokwiifana nge sha faafana. Eshi oshali shuudifa nge nai okwiipula kutya; mbela onomukalo uli ngeipi eshi tashi ka dula okulunduluka kudja ku "Uncle OK" kuya mushimwe shiwa ngaa.

Oto dimbuluka eshi luhapu nda kala nokukupula kutya ohosheende naanaa ngeipi opo u kale to monika nawa, nefiku ndeku pa ongala nonande pefimbo opo katwa li natango tu na ekwatafano lopaihole. Nandi ku shiivifile kutya; shinya okwali edidiliko kwoove okudja kwaame kutya; "ou li nale momutima wange." 

Ohandi dimbuluka eshi nda li ndeku lombwela ngaha kutya; onda hala okulundululila uukaume wetu mukaume wopopepi nowa li wa lombwelange nge kutya kakwali wii longekida, netomhelo eli kutya owa li wiipyakidila nofikola noka kwali wa hala okunyonenwa elilongo loye. Ondal li nda fimaneka omaliudo oye, ashike onda kala nda djala omukumo kutya limwe lomomafiku onandi ka vene po omutima woye. Eshi osha li sha ya uule weedula mbali, atu shangelafana uutumwalaka vaxupi keshe efiku, pehena ekoleko lasha.

Osoondaxa imwe eshi ye ya, osha li okonima yelongeloKalunga ngeenge andi dimbuluka nawa. Eshi wa landula eenghundafana detu, owali owa li wa tumina nge okatumwalaka kongodi; niitya yoye okwali oyo ei; "Pamwe, opamwe nee natu shi pe ngaa nee onghendabala." Onda li nduudite owuumbo eshi we shi ninga shaashi omolwa osho; tu li ponghatu tu li nena. Fiyo onena ohatu kendabala, nokefilonghenda laTate Kalunga onghendambala ya faafana onghee tuu i li natango miilonga. Natu twikile nonghendambala twa tamekele nayo pehena olufuwo. 

Mopaife ngaha, inya aishe ondjokonona, mkwanambwa! Ashike nandi ku dimbukife iinano ile nda kalele nokushinga okudja kOvenduka okuya kEenhana, eevili dihapu ndi li mopate. Elalakano okwali onduuye ndiku tye momesho molwashii ove okamanya kongushu. Kakwa li ashike omalweendo ongahenya, ashike iilonga yo hole, nonande okwali handi fiki nda loloka okwa li handi kala nda hafa oku ku mona twii memesha.

Oto dimbuluka eshi twali twaya mo "theatre" oshikando shotete. Ongula oyo yEtitano, mefiku lotete lomwedi Juli, omudo 2017, Tate Kalunga okwa li e tu yambeka nomaano okanona ketu kotete. Owa li wu na eenghono ngaashi ngoo shito. Sho osho sha djalekange onyati okwiitavela mwoove noshuulikila nge kutya; ohatu dulu okukufa omatokolo pamwe itatu tala kiilanduli, tu wape tu kule pamwe see tu likole owino wa wana monghalamwenyo. Eshi nandi sheefele apa.  

Ekwatafano letu lopahole ola li la tutywa eshi ndali ndi na okukala nda ya kosikola koGhana, ohandi dimbuluka pefimbo opo owa li uli kEenhana, nopwali pena ashike oshivike ndi kale nda tuka mo moshilongo. Ondishi shi kasha li shipu. Omalimbililo oye ondali ndi wuudite, nowali kaimba twiipula kutya pamwe andi faduka po. Ondishi shi onda li ndeku shingila omadilaadilo. Olweendo lokuya koGhana ola li leetelela uudjuu heeno, ashike olali ngaa natango la humbata omalalakano mawa, shaashi mulo omwa dile okalinga kotete oko nda li ndeku pa, edidiliko laasho nda li andi tungu pokati ketu.

Nandi ku dimbulukife eshi ndali ndeku ifana wuu ye kOvenduka tu kale pamwe monhele yange yo erf 3378. Kala li etungo liwa ashike okambashu kwali (laughs). Ondali ndishi shi nawa kutya kokaadona kokawambo omapulo omahapu. Tu kale pamwe omanga inatu hombola, nashikwao moima omokambashu noho. Naashi nee ndeshi piyaaneka, pefimbo opo ondahangikile ndili natango koGhana. Nonande kasha li sheku wapalela oweshi pa onghendabala okupitila meudafano liwa nenghenda. Otwa kendabala notwe shi pandulila Tate Kalunga, fiyo okunakanena ohatuke ndabala ashike.

Andi dimbuluka pefimbo nda fika moshilongo okudja koGhana kutya; oshivixa shoye osha li sha wa pedu neenghono, kaimba omadilaadilo ngaa. Osha li sheehameka omwenyo wange okumona uli monghalo wa li, ashike kombinga ikwao osha dimbulukifa nge ngaha kutya; oholehole ohai kufa efimbo, eteelelo, nosho tuu. Aishe ei owei holola mwoove "bestie" wange.

Itandi mane okupandula Tate Kalunga molwonghalamwenyo e ku pa naashi e ku mbedeka omaano okudilaadila nawa okushi taalela kokuungaunga niinima ya yoolokafana. Oove omuyandjimayele nomuvaluli kapyoko meumbo letu. Omafimbo amwe ohandiiyolele kutya oshike shahangele nge ndi dilaadile oku ka ninga omavalulo, osheshi okuvalula omomhepo yoye ku li ha mwaame. 

Tate Kalunga okwe tu yambeke nuunona vuukadona vatatu; Twapewa, Twaamenwa, naTwakulilwa. Ngashingaha iikando itatu wa ka talela po o "theater" kakadona kange. Iikando itatu. Efimbo keshe twa dilaadilile okweeta po okanona, nonande iinakukwanifwa twei shiiva kwali, owa taalela aishe neitavelo nonomukumo. Sho kushoovene oshiilongela nale okupewa ohole kamana muunyuni.

“Mummy" otwakula pamwe! Otodimbuluka kutya eshi twatameka olweendo eli kandali ndi na nande odjapo imwe, ashike ohole yoye oya pange eenghono netwomukumo ndi pule komesho; Monena, kandi na imwe ile mbali, ashime ondi na ngaashi ngaha ee"Master's Degrees" di li nhatu. Opo wa li eshi ndali nda mona iilonga yange yotete onga omuvaluli, noha ndi dimbuluka nawa lela kutya pefimbo ongodi ya li ye ya mo otwali naave. Ove okamuti kange kelao, oshisipili shokwiitalela netomhelo eshi nda fikama ndimule nena. Tangi eshi kwali wiitavela mwaame omanga naame mwene ndali inandi itavela kutya ohandi dulu. Ohandi ti tangi! 

Ondjila inai kala yuukilila. Osheshi opena meemhito dimwe opo twa li twa didilika uunyengwi mushe. Opena omafiku oo monakudiwa kwa li tuudite twa fa twa hala okuxulilifa aishe ondjilakati, andi dimbuluka nokuli omafimbo wa li ho "blocka" nge kongodi yoye. Nduudite pomafimbo wa li to dilaadila kutya kaimba haame omunhu woye oo wa pewa kOmwene, ashike itandi ku vele ombedi mwaasho. Omolwoye twa mono omhito,nomhito keshe oye tukulika monghalamwenyo, miilongwa yokudiminafana po, meteelelo nomohole. Oyo oyo uumbangi wohole yashili, aanhu vavali tava kendambala momikalo adishe tadi holoka  nonande onghalo meemhito dimwe ya kala ya djuupala.

Otwa yola, otwa lila, otwa kondja, ashike ngashingaha otwaveluka. Nonande nee twa pita mwaayishe ei, konima yefiku onghene ngaa atu lihoolola natango, nonaatango. Owa ninga nge omumati omuxwepo muholike wange, owa tula ondjila yange momutungilo ushi okutalika. Owa humbata eumbo letu nefimaneko, neitavelo nonohole.  

Muholike wange mokudilaadila aishe oyo twa pitila muyo, onda hala oku ku pandulila omutima woye muwa. Owa umbata eumbo eli nohole osho yo eteelelo neitavelo. Oove kaume kange mealikano. Oove etomhelo lange okukala meitavelo eli kutya eenghono tu na okuTate Kalunga da dja. Ohandi alikana Omwene eku kaleke muundjolowele, ayadife omafiku oye aeshe etwomukumo muudjuu keshe, ye ekuyambeke yoo needula dihapu delao, nuuyelele u tu yelele.

Ondishi shi kakadona kange, kandi shi oo e li alushe mondjila, nokuli kandi li popepi nokukala ngaha. Nandi tye ame omumati oo e na uunyengwi nomali udo haa tengauka osheshi sha dopifa nge ndiha kale ngaashi to djuulukwa alushe ndi kale. Ashike ohandi ilongo, nonda pandula unene eshi iho efa okuho0la nge nopomafiku adjuu. Nena eshi to hambelele ewanifo loye lomido omilongo nhee onda hala ashike okutya tangi eshi wa tile; "Pamwe otu shi okushi kendambala" , nomolwa keshe ekondjo wa kondjele naashi wiitavela muse. Kushi aike omukulukadi wange, ashike okaume kange yoo kopofingo, ehafo landje nedidiliko lefiku keshe kwaame kutya ohole ya shili ohai longo ngeenge aanhu vavali tava kendambala pamwe.

Ngaashi omadina uunona vetu vuukadona taa ti, Gifty, Angela, and Ebenezer bestie, olweendo twadja nale pamwe omaano okudja kOmwene. Gifty ohe tu dimbulukifa alushe omaano oo inatu teelela kwali okudja kuTate Kalunga pefimbo twali a twiilongo natango ondjila yetu. Angela ota popi ovaengeli vOmwene ovo a tuma kuse vuuye va tonatele, va wilike nokwaamena eumbo letu. Omanga Ebenezer oye eano eli eshi; "fiyo okeluwa eli lonena, eshi Omwene ta kwafaa natango"; uumbangi una omwenyo tau holola efilonghenda laye kuse monghatu keshe twa kufile. Mewanifo loye leedula omilongo nhee ohandi pandula Omwene molwomaano onghalamwenyo e kuufila nomolwa ovaengeli ovo a tuma kwoove ve ku amene mwaaishe wa pitila; oshili, o Ebenezer.

Efiku ledalo loye mewanifo leedula 40 nali ku yambekelwe muholike wange.

Nomutima wange aushe, Onesmus

CC: Twaapewa, Twaamenwa, and Twakulilwa

Otu ku hole alushe

English  version.

As I put pen to paper, baby girl, my heart is full of joy because, I am writing about a journey I boldly began the day I approached my friend, who is now my wife, my lady and asked that we take our friendship to another level. I can say that, back then, we could never have imagined what was ahead.

Bestie, today we mark a silver milestone, your 40th birthday and I have to say, I can hardly believe it because you look so young! Truly, you are aging like fine wine. My lady, my best friend, the mother of our three little musketeers who annoy me in all the sweetest ways possible today is your day.

You probably know by now that whenever I want to say something special, I put it on paper (you probably recall a dozen of love letters I wrote to you in the past). There is  something about writing it down; I mean you will always have a chance to come back and read my words whenever you doubt me.

So today, I want to talk to you not with big fancy words; because you know I can, right? but with my heart to remind you, as my partner before God, of the journey we have shared and shaped, a journey I am proud of every single day.

I am sure you can remember how we got here, but if you can’t, I am here and I have your back to remind you. Remember, I had already crafted a vision in my heart before I even approached you. 

I can vividly remember, as if it was yesterday the first time I met you. It was in Windhoek, at a work conference, both of us cops, right? I recall you were delivering a presentation, confident and beautiful, with your long black hair and those white eyes that seem to shine through everything. In happiness and in tribulation, I still see them. I remember my thoughts that troubled me: “Wow… she’s beautiful.” I didn’t know then that that moment was the start of something that would change my life. ( I recall telling Malunge and Shikeva about you, what I saw and they just laughed.)

During the coffee break, I tried to play it cool, complimented your presentation, but honestly, I was already gone. Then we started talking, exchanging numbers, and somehow, we became friends. We both discovered we had mutual friends who called me “Uncle OK,” (the likes of Karen and many others I meant many uses to call me uncle for reasons that they can defend I promise) and before I knew it, you were calling me that too. This was a bit disappointing because I was like, how will then this change from “Uncle OK” to the father of your three girls. Life has humor.

You remember how I used to ask you how you managed to always look so good? What about that day at the mall when I gave you roses even though we were not dating? That was me saying, “You’re already in my heart.”

I remember when I told you that we should transform our friendship into a very close friend. You told me then that you weren’t ready; apparently, you were busy with school, focused, and not ready to be distracted. And I respected that, because distraction was going to be!  But deep down, I knew that one day, I would win your heart. That went on for two years, this was long ,but I had hope. We used to message each other every day, in each other’s DMs, without any dating. 

Then one Sunday came, I recall very well that it was after church. You texted me on my follow-up and here are your words: “I thought of what you told me and I think, maybe, just maybe, we should try”. And I’m so glad you did, because look at us now. We are still trying, and by God’s grace, the try keeps working. Let us keep trying without relent my love.

At this point, the rest is history but let me remind you of the long distances I used to drive from Windhoek to Eenhana; just long hours on the road, all to see you because you are a gem. Those weren’t just trips; they were love in motion. I would arrive tired but happy, just to see your smile.

Do you remember the day we walked into the theater together for the first time? Our first experience as parents nervous, excited, and full of anticipation. That Friday morning, 01 July 2017, God blessed us with our first bundle of joy. You were strong, as always. That made me believe even more in your determination and showed me that together, we can take any risk to grow and experience life.  Let us park that one there. 

Our relationship got truly tested when I had to leave for Ghana. I remember that time you were in Eenhana, and it was just a week before I had to jet off. I know it wasn’t easy. I could feel your worries,  maybe you thought I was running away. I know I pushed you into thoughts. But let me tell you this mummy, the Ghana trip came with challenges, but it also came with purpose because it’s where I bought the first ring I gave you, a symbol of what I was building for us.

Remember when I asked you to move to Windhoek and stay at my place erf 3378?  No proper building, just a kabashu (laughs). I knew that was a lot to ask from a Wambo lady. To live in before marriage, and in a shack on top of that! And to make it worse, I was still in Ghana at the time. But you gave it a try, with so much compromise and grace. We tried and thanked God, the try still seems to be working.

I remember when I looked at you for the first time after arriving back from Ghana; you were thin and had lost weight, maybe from all the worries, or should I say komadiladilo. My heart broke seeing that, but it also reminded me how much love truly costs, surely time, patience, and sacrifice. You made it all worth it bestie.

I can’t thank God enough for your life and for the way you’re designed to think, to handle things, to hold our family together. You are the greatest adviser and accountant our family could ever have. Sometimes I laugh to myself and think maybe I should have not studied accounting because the accountant spirit lives in you, not me.

Fast forward, God blessed us with three beautiful daughters: Twaapewa, Twaamenwa, and Twakulilwa. You have been to that theater three times, baby girl. Three times. Each time we decided to try for another baby, we both knew the risks involved, yet you faced it with such courage and faith. That alone deserves every kind of love this world can give.

Maria, you have seen me grow and encouraged me to always push the envelope. When we started, I was not even a university graduate. But your love gave me the strength and motivation to push further; today, I hold not one, not two, but three master’s degrees. You were there when I got my first job as an accountant, and I still remember that day clearly, the moment the call came through, I was with you. You are my good-luck charm. Thank you for believing in me, even when I did not believe in myself. Tangi ngheyaange!.

Our journey has not been perfect. We have had our low moments just like every other couple. There were days when we both felt like giving up, and I remember those moments you used to block me. Maybe at that time you thought I was not the one, and I honestly cannot blame you. But you gave us a chance, and that single chance grew into a life, into many lessons of forgiveness, patience, and love. That is what it costs; two people willing to keep showing up, even when it is hard, even when it is uncomfortable.

I know, my lady, that I am not a perfect man, not even close. I am just a human being with flaws and moods that may not always be pleasant. But I am learning, and I am forever thankful that you have never stopped loving me, even on the hard days.

We have laughed, we have cried, we have fought, and we have healed. And through it all, we have kept choosing each other, again and again. You have made me a better man, and just be proud. You have shaped my path, raised our girls with so much grace, and stood firm even when life tested us. You carried our home with dignity, faith, and love; the kind that speaks quietly but moves mountains. 

Baby girl, as I think about everything we have walked through, I just want to thank you for your golden heart. You are my prayer partner, my intercessor, and the reason I am always reminded that our strength comes from the Lord. I pray that God keeps you healthy, fills your days with courage, and blesses you with many more years to shine your light upon us.

So today, as you celebrate your birthday, I just want to say thank you for saying, “maybe we should try,” for every sacrifice you have made, and for believing in us. You are not just my wife but a truly best friend that the universe blessed me with..

Just like the names of our daughters, Gifty, Angela, and Ebenezer bestie, our journey together is a gift from God. Gifty reminds us of the unexpected gift of love and life we received when we were still learning our way. Angela speaks of the angels God sent to watch over us, guiding and protecting our family. And Ebenezer is our declaration that “up to this point, the Lord has helped us”; a living testimony of His faithfulness in every step we have taken together.

I thank God for the gift of your life and for the angels who have protected you through it all; truly, it is Ebenezer.

 

Happy 40th birthday, my lady.  Psalm 118:17

With all my heart,

Your husband, Onesmus

CC: Twaapewa, Twaamenwa, and Twakulilwa

Happy 40th Birthday, our Queen! We love you always